14 Ways to Kill Your Church
Written by Rev. W. Scott Lockard

1. Don't Come!
2. If you come, Come late.
3. Come with a grouch!
4. If you serve; Serve with Laziness.
5. At every service ask yourself, What do I do to get out of this!
6. Never accept and office. Better to stay outside and criticize.
7. Visit other churches about half of the time to indicate to your pastor that you're not tied down.
8. Let the pastor earn his money; Let him do all the work!
9. Sit pretty well back and never sing. Don't smile either.
10. Never encourage the preacher.
11. Never pay in Advance, especially for religion.Wait until you get your money's worth.
12. It is good to tell of your pastor's failing to a stranger that may happen by; They might be a long time finding out.
13. If there are a few zealous members in the church make a protest against the church being run by a clique!
14. If your church unfortunately happens to be harmonious, refer to the unity as indifference of lack of zeal, or anything at all except what it is.

Let us avoid these things at all costs!

In Jesus' Love,
Pastor W. Scott Lockard